We are updating our home. We bought it nearly a year ago (man does time fly – hasn’t felt like a year here in Cali). At the time we were looking to buy a home here in this area, there were 12 on the market. Yes only 12 that somewhat fit our desires. We bought the one that best fit our needs (and was within our budget) and was in an ideal location. After all, it’s all about location. The house was well cared for but never updated since it was built in the early 80’s.
Fresh paint, some new flooring and a few small remodeling projects (added a bedroom using the game room space and removed two wet bars so far). Still lots more to do but it takes time and money so the process is slow.
One of the updates is new baseboard. The existing baseboard was small, cracking and had seen a lot of abuse. The new baseboard is larger and stronger.
Its amazing what a new base can do. The new baseboard makes the rooms seem stronger.
I’m working on a new base. Sometimes I think our lives can get a little outdated. Our routines start to feel safe and we get used to them so we leave them alone and after a while we just get comfortable so we don’t update.
Removing the old baseboard and flooring created a huge mess, not to mention a lot of debris. It had to be done because the previous owners had a dog – that’s all I’ll say about that. It was stressful but after it was gone it was freeing. It’s the same when we start dismantling our routines. Its uncomfortable and can lead to discovering problems that were hidden beneath. There is debris.
Last week I made some very poor choices with my words and actions. I hurt friends. Basically I pissed on things and people I love. (see comment about the previous owners and their dog). I didn’t do it intentionally – honestly I just had too much pile up and couldn’t hold it anymore. But the result is me pulling up the old base and laying a new one. There is a lot of debris. Still updating my base will make me stronger.
The new base will affect how I interact with people and friends. It will allow me to let my kids have more freedom with their diabetes to develop additional independence. It will mean less helicoptering in general. (see Helicopter parent here if you don’t get the reference) It will mean truly starting to make ME a priority – finding time to exercise, changing some eating habits, drinking more water and asking others if they want help rather than simply assuming they do ( < this one is really huge for me and might be the hardest one for me to update).
Not sure if this makes any sense but its my blog and I can be confusing and ambiguous if I want to. When I started my blog I started it to clear my head and hold myself accountable. Sharing this helps me hold me accountable.
Stick With It Sugar 
The new baseboard looks nice!
But to be honest, I always liked the old Christina (no, I’m not calling you old…that’s not what I meant!). I’ll always support a decision to try to better oneself and to grow and improve, but I hope this doesn’t change fundamentally who you are. You’re a good person; and from what I know (strictly through this blog and the occasional twitter chat) always have been.
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Thanks Scott. I am who I am and that can’t change. I am also exactly the person you know on this blog and social media. However – sometimes we do need to update how we react to people and events. Sometimes it is at the precipice that we change. Actually it is always at the precipice. Change is hard and most don’t just decide to change a behavior until that behavior creates chaos. I believe I am a good person and I can honestly say that mistakes I’ve made in the past (including last week) were without malice. Still even good people make mistakes and need to work to change the behaviors that lead to the mistakes. My biggest character flaw is my uncanny ability to seem overbearing. I don’t mean to overstep my bounds – it is always done with good intentions but isn’t there a road paved with good intentions somewhere? I am outspoken, opinionated, and can seem very pushy. Those character traits can be beneficial as an advocate but in daily life interactions they are not qualities I want to hang onto. Im still me and my past made me who I am, the future I hope for makes me who I am, my mistakes this past week will be a part of who I will be. A better me. A me that I like better.
Thank you for all your kindness and support I sure hope I get to add you to my list of bloggers I’ve met soon.
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Funny how we start blogs with the intention of educating and helping others and these same blogs end up helping us in so many ways we never thought they could.
I love you and all of who you are, my friend. I hope the old baseboard comes out easily with little mess and the new goes in smoothly. And yeah, I mean it in both senses. *hugs*
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Tis true chris. I did start my blog mostly to clear my head and share. I didn’t think many others would tune in so I am always surprised when people read and comment. My blog has certainly done more for me than others Im sure. Its odd – when I feel too overwhelmed or anxious my first response has been to step back from social media and my blog. I think that has been a mistake. Some of the most supportive friends I have are ones I’ve never met (thats includes you).
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